Tag: The Queen

Musk ticks, three stripes and Ye’s out, RIP Her Maj and lions on the loose…

Posted on by SW

Since my last serving of steaming randomswill back in the year 1627, quite a bit has happened.

In no particular order…

Note the protestor glued to the side

Elon Musk bought Twitter and the world lost its mind. I enjoyed Stephen King negotiating with Musk on Twitter about the cost of a verified blue tick. He didn’t even need to send in Carrie or Cujo. Martina Navratilova served an ace straight down the middle with her reply to Musk that she didn’t ask for the blue tick, she won’t pay for it and her “peeps” know who she is.

Queen Elizabeth II died. (I’m not a fan of the softer “passed away” “or we lost…” Where? down the back of the lounge? Or worse, “crossed the rainbow bridge”. She died.) But I digress. I’m a staunch Australian republican and believe it’s high time the apron strings were severed and Australia finally had our own head of state. It’s ludicrous that in 2022 Australia’s head of state is a non-elected English person who just happened to have the brilliant luck (though not according to a certain Harry of California) of being born into the right family in a certain sibling order. Having said that, I admire the Queen’s amazing devotion to duty. Some of these snowflakes who want to WFH forever could take a leaf out of Her Majesty’s gilt-edged book.

To Kanye West or Ye or whatever he is calling himself today. Bravo to Adidas and the other companies who have dropped him quicker than he could make another appalling antisimetic remark. Three stripes and he’s out. I loved Stephen Colbert’s line about West’s Yeezy shoes looking like someone put a pair of Crocs in the microwave.

The UK is an absolute clusterfuck. Enough said.

Five lions had a Born Free moment after escaping from their enclosure at Sydney’s Taronga Zoo… into another enclosure. It seemed the media desperately wanted them to be prowling down nearby Military Road devouring Mozman-dahlings as they climbed into their Range Rovers with their half skim decaf soy macchiato made from Peruvian numbat milk. Didn’t happen. Somebody said on Twitter the lions saw the dire state of the Sydney property rental market and scarpered back to their enclosure, locking the gate behind them.

People are gluing themselves to things. Apparently this is to bring attention to climate change and the impact of fossil fuels. These are obviously very noble causes and ones that are vitally important to the future of the planet, but I’m not sure if gluing yourself to a road inconveniencing people trying to get to work, or more importantly urgently trying to get to a hospital, or gluing yourself to a priceless artwork is a great way to gain positive traction for your cause. I suggest these morons glue themselves to one of the aforementioned Elon Musk’s SpaceX rockets. That would deserve a tick.

©Steve Williams 2022

Coronavirus – just beat it (hee, hee)

Posted on by SW

So maybe Michael Jackson was right after all.

The mask… I’m talking about the mask.

Wacko Jacko hasn’t been moonwalking through these unprecedented times (DRINK!!) but he was rather partial to a mask. I’m not sure if it was to shield him from potential airborne viruses or pesky paparazzi. More likely, it was to stop his nose falling off.

Where I live, masks are compulsory in shops and on public transport and I am growing quite accustomed to wearing one. Though, unlike the angel-like healthcare workers, I don’t have to wait until the end of a harrowing 97 hour shift, I can take the mask off after buying a carton of milk or catching a train.

Masks do pose some etiquette questions, including greeting friends and acquaintances etc. I assume one of those etiquette whisperers who pop up on talkback radio when someone touches the Queen has a website devoted to this.

I’ve had a few haircuts since the start of the unpleasantness, and it is a novel (spot the coronavirus reference) experience removing the strap while holding one side of the mask in place as the lovely Tim wields his magic. I don’t mind a chat at the hairdresser, but via two masks, the conversation is as filtered as hopefully the bits of COVID-19.

All these are planted the seeds will eventually lead to the collapse of the nuclear family. purchase generic cialis Helps in development tadalafil buy of new tissue in the body. The article compiles simple and reliable levitra generika davidfraymusic.com information. The main free cialis no prescription ingredient of these various versions of kamagra brand are featured with various benefits.

Non-verbal communication is challenging with the mask, you take the power of the smile for granted. I’m deliberately trying to smile more with my eyes, or to use that godawful word… “smize”.

It was interesting at a restaurant the other night watching people arrive wearing masks, then, like a weird masquerade party (thankfully not Eyes Wide Shut weird), they facially disrobed as they sat at their table – or for English readers, “were sat at their table.”

I’m amused by the cliched-redneck-Trump-lovin’-pickup-truck-drivin’-Confederate-flag-wavin’ types who are up in arms (literally) about having to wear a mask to protect others and themselves, but demand their rights to the 62th Amendment that they can carry a big fuckoff bazooka into a Wendy’s for their protection.

STFU and just wear a mask.

I’m not a virologist and can’t confirm the number of eyes the coronavirus has, but as Michael Jackson so eloquently sang, “There ain’t no second chance against the thing with forty eyes, girl.”

©Steve Williams 2020