This week online forums fired up with talk about whether or not you should be allowed to film births, after a report it had been banned. I’d like to know why you’d want to in the first place.
I know it’s all about documenting the miracle of birth and so on, but why would you even think about taking a video camera into a delivery room?
Maybe there’s some confusion with the operating “theatre” concept.
I’m sure your wife/girlfriend/partner/sister/mother (no, that’s too weird) would love a camera in her face and elsewhere while she’s enduring the most excruciatingly painful experiences you can
imagine – even if she’s totally drugged up to the eyeballs.
One would think the person wielding the camera could actually be more use and support at the other, er, non-business end.
You can’t blame the medical staff for having issues with privacy – they’re at work. I wouldn’t want a camera on me when I’m working – and my work isn’t highly specialised, involving life and death.
There’s also the annoyance/danger of having a work experience Tarantino getting in their way: “Sorry, had to change the battery, can you put Trevor back in? Ta. Cue the screaming… Action”.
A Melbourne mum had issues with the ban, saying she had a caesarean and “couldn’t see anything that was going on, so I wanted a video”. Really? You want to see it? In all its wide screen, high def, gory glory? Really? Why not shoot it in 3D while you’re at it?
Apart from that, who are you going to show the video to? Whack it in the DVD player when there’s nothing on telly that night? You could also upload it to UterusTube.
There are endless options – you could cut it together like one of those before-and-after wedding videos for friends and family, “Now that’s us conceiving Trevor… yep, that was the moment…then…“Look my uterus is fully dilated! (Waaaaaaah!) Geez Nathan, I told you to get a closeup there…”
Count me out of that slide night.
Fast forward to Trevor’s 21st – a night to remember – “Can we have a bit of shush up the back, got a little video to show you all…”
©Steve Williams 2012
*I used the keyword “birth” in a search on a free stock photo site. This was the result: Obviously.
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